Do You Need to Succeed, or Just Want to Succeed

In a previous blog post “I’ve Got to Ditch the Gold Rush Mentality”, I said I needed to get the gold rush mindset out of my head. Affiliate marketing is not going to be a show-up and just pull the gold nuggets out of the creek, get rich in a week, and retire in Bolivia by next year situation.

If I want to succeed at Affiliate Marketing I have to think of it as a business and realize it’s going to take some effort – just like starting any real business. It’s a great business to start, with a whole lot of advantages for the solopreneur, but it takes some effort.

When I started my first business in 2011, I was out of work.

My first child was a toddler, and my wife was pregnant with our second – I’d been fired from my previous job (for “philosophical differences”, whatever that means)  just over a week after we found out she was pregnant. 

I couple years earlier I had tried to start a coffee shop. The “Great Recession” killed that. But it wasn’t that big of a deal. My wife had a good job, and we could easily pay the bills even if I didn’t work.

But this time the situation had drastically changed. This time I NEEDED to succeed so that I could take care of my family.

There’s a big difference between wanting and needing. Think about yourself right now, do you want to make money online? Or do you need to?

Now sure; you could say that needing to do something creates an air of desperation in our actions.

It does, I know that to be true. I had no income, no money for bills, nothing. I was desperate. But I wasn’t desperate in a way that made me act like a fool. I was desperate in a way that focused me and made me do what needed to be done.

But needing to succeed meant:

Seeking out advice and guidance from people who could help me, AND following through on what they told me

But just “wanting” to succeed actually meant:

Behaving like someone who was desperate to make money, but who didn’t really follow through with anything like I needed to.

Big difference there.

It is good to be desperate to change the circumstances you are in. It is not good to feel desperate – trying to find that quick and easy thing that will make all your dreams come true.

I’ve seen it happen to myself and countless others – money doesn’t present itself to us because we want it … doesn’t matter how badly we want it. Or how much we fantasize about it.

Money doesn’t care about what we want. The people who we want to sell to, don’t care about our whys for making money.

Money presents itself to us only when we are disciplined and focused on doing all the things that are repeatedly proven to lead to the result of earning money.

Now, if you are reading this, there is a very strong possibility that you really want to make money online. You want to make affiliate marketing work.

The truth is … 

You won’t make it work with that internal dialogue.

You need your very own Epiphany Switch. And no, I don’t want you to have to lose your job to have it. You can have it now.


I’ll talk about that in my next blog post.

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19 responses to “Do You Need to Succeed, or Just Want to Succeed”

  1. Nathan nice post you have gotten me intrigued about part 2. looking forward to your next post!

  2. Thank you for sharing your story.

    I agree with most of what you said in this post, except that I feel “desperate” doesn’t seem like the right word to use.

    I think “determined” is a much better word to describe your situation.

    1. Alan, I would agree. I just wanted to be a little hyperbolic. Feeling desperate can lead to panic and foolish decisions. So even when the situation is truly a desperate one, we must learn to keep our composure and not let negative emotions control us.

  3. This is so true for me… I have played with affiliate marketing for a while, I wanted to make money on line but I did not need to. Now thigh I need to raise an additional 40K this year to pay for the building of my house, and that NEED has resulted in a much sharper focus!

  4. Great post Alan,

    Short and to the point. I have to say needing and wanting to quite a few things. Need new clothes or want new clothes.. Then I have to think do i have money for it, nope! ok then i need to wait. 🙂

    again great post.. looking forward to the how!

  5. ooops sorry Nathan,

    I didn’t mean to type Alan, please forgive me.

  6. A growth mindset, a willingness to keep going no matter what, and understanding that failure doesn’t exist, it’s ALWAYS a learning opportunity.

    That is what will make your business a success.

    Thanks for a great post.

    Cheers, Katrin

  7. Nathan, Simple and True! I had someone tell me one time that the level of hurt that we are going through drives what we are willing to do to overcome that hurt. Changing our mindset to reflect our drive to “Succeed” instead of “Accept” is a determining factor in our Success! Continue On!

  8. Nathan, thanks for a very insightful blog. Your point at the end around money is incredibly important. I was and still am a little bit guilty of this. We know from what we’ve learnt about building the business that we should be following the process, however, you still hear it in the back of your head that I need money and I want money. This mindset has to change, otherwise it will creep forward and take over everything. We need to act and behave in the right way to build our business and our audience. The side effect of that will be sales and money. It’s hard to think that way because we’re trying to control the end so it’s like the tail is wagging the dog. With a little patience things will get clearer and in time I am very confident that this will all happen for us. Thank you so much, Atif.

  9. Don’t chase money let money chase you! Dean says that all the time!

    Interestingly, this week I discovered different sources of money I didn’t know I had, adding up to 12K. What a wonderful discovery! Adding a tax return to that adds up to 20K because of a tax break I procured by the installment of solar panels!

    I’m just saying, the Law Of Attraction works! I’ve been diligently practicing pulling to me the life of my dreams and that’s how I found this program, as well. Mindset takes time to reset.

  10. Nathan, I don’t say this comment lightly, so please don’t take it as such: you have the entrepreneurial spirit, my friend. And because of that, you have absolutely everything it takes to not only do this affiliate marketing thing, but do it well! I’m new to affiliate marketing and I’m just now getting my business up and running (like you) so I don’t have the affiliate marketing experience under my belt (yet), HOWEVER, I have run a brick-and-mortar business for more than 10 years prior to this journey. One thing I have learned (in all of my infinite wisdom, haha) is that some people are born to do this, and I feel some people, well, probably shouldn’t. It’s not for the weak of heart… but it’s worth it. You have a HUGE why and there’s nothing stronger than this family of yours fueling that “WHY.” The last thing you said will serve you so very well… don’t chase the money… let it chase you. Focus on the journey.. and the reason why you’re doing what you’re doing. I didn’t set out to give you all this advice on my reply, my apologies. I just thoroughly enjoyed your post. I know there aren’t many people out there that are destined for success and I like to “call it like I see it,” if you know what I mean.

    1. Thank you, I really appreciate your comment – it is very encouraging

  11. Hey Nathan, I think a few people probably relate to the desperate way of things especially money. At the moment I have a good paying job but like you mentioned that job can be gone at the drop of a hat. So now I need your next blog so we can make that money!! LOL. Have a great week ahead and I am looking forward to your next blog.

  12. I’m telling the same thing: affiliate marketing is a real business and like all businesses, we need to put time and efforts in it to make it works for us. It’s clear that we need to be determined with our WHY close to our heart.
    Thank you Nathan for your post.

  13. Hi Nathan!
    So true. The title is definitely thought-provoking! “Want” vs. “Need” is a daily struggle in many areas, but especially in the affiliate marketing business. We need to focus on the purpose of our business with consistent effort.
    I’m looking forward to future posts!
    All the best!
    Milissa Neirotti

  14. Thinking about myself right now…making money online – I want it. I need it. Nice way to end your post – with some suspense on what’s coming next!

  15. Hi Nathan,
    This is an inspiring post, thanks for sharing more of your story.
    I believe as you said that it’s a different realm of living when we are doing this because we “Need” to do it. That’s where I’m at, but making sure not to let the “need” cause me to make bad decisions out of fear. I’m all in!

  16. Nathan,
    Affiliate marketing is like any business. you have to work at it in order to succeed, and yes, we must be disciplined. The quick and easy way is not the right way, as I have found out that it does not work. I look forward to your next post.

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